Here’s How to Stop “Going Through the Motions.”
For the most part, we all know what won’t work.
We know that being radically honest with people doesn’t work all the time.
We know that short-cuts up the corporate ladder don’t work all the time.
We know that being “unique” is the opposite of what most people want.
We also know that these are the fictitious limits that live inside our heads.
It’s this “tried and tested” mindset most people adopt that feeds into these collective, agreed-upon standards we’ve set.
Why fix what’s not broke? Why try x when y has always worked perfectly fine? For the most part, phrases like these represent something called complacency.
The literal meaning of the word is “very pleased” as derived from its Latin root. What does it mean to be complacent in practice? The phrases I listed above are a good indication of what it’s like to think and be complacent.
Here are a few other ways to put it.
- To come to a self-induced standstill.
- To stall or make excuses.
- To instinctively decide to maintain the status quo.
Here’s how people become complacent.
- Fear of rejection.
- Fear of failure.
- Fear of success. (yes, this is a real thing.)
Notice that the underlying trend here is fear. The relationship you build with fear, in general, will ultimately decide how you harness what is likely the strongest source of unlimited willpower — though that’s a topic for another time.
Why not be complacent?
I’ve painted quite a picture so far, haven’t I? One that seems rather pessimistic, unambitious, belittling etc. It wouldn’t be fair of me to not address that.
What’s wrong with being complacent?
At the same time as all those other factors, complacency means being content. It can mean waking up and being comfortable.
But “comfortable” is misleading. We all attach a positive connotation to the word — but I want to point out that “being comfortable” is very similar and a small misstep away from the slippery slope of “being unconcerned.”
As human beings, one of our greatest abilities is to care deeply and unrelentingly.
If we cease to care, we halt one of the greatest gears running the machines of our minds. A lot of the work we do is trivial…and for what?
For most, it is the price paid in ultimately working towards solving a greater issue. Why do we work towards greater issues? Because we care.
I don’t want this to be something you tie to a global pandemic like the one we’re having right now — but if you are one of the millions of people staying indoors with likely a lot of unstructured time, it can be really easy to become hedonistic.
Rejecting complacency is a timeless shift in mindset that will stop you from ever finding yourself just going through the motions.
A compliant life is one that will likely involve regret. I don’t want that, and I’m sure you don’t either.
Why have I brought regret into the mix? The regret comes from blanket statements that eventually snowball into true depictions of our lives. Saying things like “well you can’t have everything” or “I deserved that, I should’ve gotten it.” Blame casting is suddenly a norm for you — whether you realize it or not.
Of course, complacency looks different for anyone. Another distinction must be made between being complacent and wanting to lead a mediocre life.
There’s nothing wrong with living a mediocre life. There’s nothing objectively wrong with mediocrity. I do find, though, that many have disillusioned themselves into believing that they are leading a life that is anything but…and the lack of self-awareness is where the problem begins.
Taking breaks is not an indication that you are being complacent.
This goes out to all the perfectionists and overly ambitious. A big balance I think that needs to be achieved with complacency is balance. The way I see it, balance is never fair.
There is always a give and take. A trade-off. Your capacity is just that — your capacity. It can be stretched — but not in a sustainable way. “Achieving balance” is finding value and peace with the trade-offs you have made.
You do not need to be productive 100% of the time. There is the other extreme to complacency — an almost magnetic repulsion to mediocrity.
There is a distinguishable difference between taking a break to prevent burnout and being lazy or complacent.
The key factor is awareness 🔑
There is something to be said too about complacency and taking an unconventional path. Being conventional is not the same as being complacent. But being unconventional is also not a surefire way to avoid complacency.
Part of taking an unconventional path to achieve unconventional success is learning to be okay with ambiguity.
What is lacking in a conventional lifestyle and path is this learning curve. It’s something I highly suggest embarking upon and learning.
A very important part of that process is self-policing. Being okay with ambiguity while growing exponentially is also a very small misstep away from being complacent with how things are. It’s a difference in where you place your energy. Decide what is important to you and care about it with a passion.
A really great quote that always stokes the fire of ambition for me is this one by Steve Jobs.
Remember: the ones who are pushing the boundaries are the ones who set it.
That doesn’t mean you have to be the next Elon Musk and change the world. What it does mean, is you have to take control of setting your boundaries.
I’m not the only one who thinks it’s important to combat complacency, and it isn’t just a “self-help” kick. It’s literally just good for the world if you do not conform to the masses. History has seen this again and again.
One case-setting example is that of Hannah Arendt, an American-German philosopher of the early 20th century. She was the first to say that complacency was “the banality of evil.” Of course, the context from where this statement came is very important here.
She was talking about how “evil” doings during the Holocaust were not the result of malevolence but instead, the result of complacency. She talked about how crimes were committed because of those who thoughtlessly obeyed orders to conform to the masses.
She said, “There is a strange interdependence between thoughtlessness and evil.”
In her novel, the human condition, she explains thoughtlessness as:
Thoughtlessness — the heedless recklessness or hopeless confusion or complacent repetition of ‘truths’ which have become trivial and empty — seems to be among the outstanding characteristics of our time.”
— Hannah Arendt, “The Human Condition”
The circumstances from where these quotes and thoughts stem from are much more severe and dire than what we would need to apply anti-complacency to nowadays — but the principle remains the same.
We all must learn to think for ourselves. Diversity in thought is a massive contributor to progress and acceptance.
Here are five ways to combat complacency.
With all this talk about what happens when we become complacent, I’ll shed some light too on how to avoid it.
- Practice Discomfort — Complacency is part of the human condition. It is severely normal to be this way. Challenge yourself every once in a while to do something you really don’t want to do. Take cold showers. Sing in public.
- Practice Self-Forgiveness. It’s okay to mess up and be comfortable. You are imperfect. Do not let one slip lead to a slippery slope. Remember your big picture.
- Train Curiosity. Remind yourself why you’re doing what you do. Learn new things when you need intellectual stimulus. Build disciplined horsepower. Take breaks when you need to re-align.
- Track Your Progress. Complacency innately ruins progress. Build systems to hold yourself accountable for the things that matter. Try building this skill by doing things like filling out a habit tracker, setting realistic and achievable monthly goals (attach a time-frame) or writing a daily reflection of your progress. (Check out this article I wrote about some of the general best practices of the world’s best 😉)
- Remember You Are Mortal. The final and most important combatant — Memento Mori. The most effective way of kick-starting sluggish progress is to create a sense of urgency. One day you will die. Your time here is limited. Make the most of it.
With all that is going on, it can be really easy to lose motivation to focus on growth, work on projects or learn. Staying safe and healthy is the number one priority right now, and all of those things can easily take a back-seat.
That being said, I believe that in some cases those very things might just be what help to take your mind off of everything going on, and perhaps, can be what shines a little bit of light in a dark time. ❤
If you enjoyed this article, be sure to give it a few 👏s and follow me on Medium!
- Feel free to connect with me on LinkedIn
- Check out my personal website
